Sunday, December 16, 2012

4 weeks

In 4 weeks I will be embarking on the biggest journey of my life thus far.  To say that I am excited or nervous would be far too easy.  Like those fancy drinks you get at trendy eateries (Leon's), I am a complex mix of emotions that has such depth and layers.  Due to the fact that I am still processing through what those all are, I will leave them for a later post (maybe).  An interesting aspect about this time before I leave is that it is also the season of Advent.  The time of waiting in eager anticipation of the Lords birth.  I love Christmas.  I love the season of cooler weather, scarves, hanging with friends and family, and ultimately of the birth of our Savior.  It seems to be in perfect conjunction with what I am experiencing at this time in my life.  I am waiting and anticipating Christmas, as well as leaving for India...while at the same time trying to be as present as possible in my daily life.  To do these things with patience is a difficult thing.  There is a tension between wanting the time to slow down and expectantly wanting to be in India.  The Lord has, is, and will be preparing me and I am so thankful for that.  Everything is falling into place in ways that I could not have expected, but am also not surprised about.  During this waiting period I am trying, but mostly I am releasing.  I have given up trying to see everyone I want to before January 16.  I have given up things I think I deserve and clinging to the fact that all God promised me was his presence and love.  All the rest is a gift, so I will enjoy my gifts this Advent season.

More to come...